sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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