you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize