i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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