I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
