no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
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I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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