i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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