I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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