she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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