You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
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