turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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