marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
high people should be assigned attendants
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize