She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
