My liver just broke up with me...
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
