i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
