i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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