awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
