Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Randomize
