I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
