Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I think i got beer on your cat.
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