Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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