I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
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