i permit you to call me
Small penises have feelings too.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Randomize