This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
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