"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
be right there i have to get my cape
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Randomize
