I'm eating all of the evidence.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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