On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
