and i looked up. we had an audience...
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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