Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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