omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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