she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
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