hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
