dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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