laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
i came on her dog
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
