Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Randomize
