and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
