im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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