nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
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