They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
