Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Randomize
