She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
