Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
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