Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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