All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
i've created a new STD.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize