meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
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