You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Floor bacon is actually really good
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
