I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.