there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
