We won't sleep together?
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Just pee around me
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
