I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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