Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize