well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
