Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
