Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
