it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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